By Iesha Westmoreland
For couples starting a family the journey to conceive is not always an easy one. When
hearing of the different conceiving stories it is mainly just a one-sided story. Whether the stories are regarding a natural process or through fertility treatment it is mainly from the women’s perspective. We become so consumed in the women’s feelings; we hardly hear the man’s side.
The men are feeling overwhelming emotions and thought as well. The man must provide compassion and support in a position that is foreign to them.
PCOS is a medical abbreviation for a female reproductive condition called Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome. It is not as mainstream as the several medical concerns that are attributed to it, but it should be treated with the same degree of awareness and concern when it comes to your health. This less known syndrome effects 1-in- 5 women world-wide. Usually starting to show signs during puberty that can lead to infertility or problems conceiving, diabetes, depression, and high-blood pressure. These are just a few of the more well-known medical conditions mentioned previously.
When a couple with a woman diagnosed with PCOS are trying to conceive the couple fight a very emotional and meaningful point in their relationship. A struggle hidden from public eye they must face together. PCOS has many effects that the women must go through. Both medically and emotionally. Thoughts and emotions brought on by society, and their own haunting aspirations they had for their life.
Having to under-go and recoup from extensive medical testing, procedures, and treatment. While the women do have to experience most of the pain we cannot excuse the man’s perspective in the matter. The men taking this journey with their partner have a tremendous position in the process. While the women are going through dieting, fertility treatment, or prescription side
effects the man must provide support. He must be a shoulder to cry on, an ear to listen, and a crutch when their significant other is too weak to move.
The men must become knowledgeable about a topic that could not be more foreign to their life experiences. Being bombarded with
medical facts that they need to know to help their partner. When the men were asked they had some endearing responses. Most all men when asked about their prior knowledge of PCOS will tell you they had no idea of the syndrome. After being exposed to the knowledge of the medical disorder they become immensely remorseful for their partner. Stating, “I never knew a woman had to go through all of this. It sure makes my prospective on conceiving completely different.”
They see it is a process that can be more advanced than what is taught is Sex Education Class. Finding a new-found respect for women. A common feeling the men expressed was not feeling like he was doing enough to be there. To be the bearer of security and strength in the relationship. They feel weak and helpless. “I can only do so much, and it pains me to know my wife or girlfriend is
experiencing this and I can’t do that much about it”, stated a PCOS Husband.
These husbands and boyfriends are now wanting to educate the world. They become so remorseful for women they jump at the chance to help spread awareness and fight for the cause.
It makes the men want to help by teaching the youth or helping a fellow PCOS patient anyway they can. Imagine how a man must wake up every day and help their emotional and ailing
wife/girlfriend. Having to research the steps they need to take to help effectively.
Their thoughts of, is this the right thing? Can this help her? Or what can I do, how can I do more? Questions that are haunting for lots of husbands/ boyfriends. When it comes to matters of family planning these questions and concerns are way to current for PCOS sufferers.
We need to find out more about how the men feel in the matter. Helping them to help our mothers achieve the goal of starting a family can be a great tool in the process. Accurate knowledge to provide better strength and security to their partner. Conceiving
healthier babies, while improving the life and relationship with the mother.